Posts by Kim:
What does this statement really mean? When reworded, I think we can begin to understand it better.
“I have chosen to take offense to someone’s words or actions.”
This wording is more accurate. It helps me understand that I have a choice. To choose to be offended, I first have to judge the actions or words of someone.
Let me pause here and say that I have certainly been offended before. Sometimes for good reason (whatever that is). And sometimes for not so good reasons. And if I’m truthful, I think a better description of my emotion would have been called “hurt.” Generally speaking, I’m not an easy person to offend. Here’s why…
As I said before, to choose offense, I have to first judge the words or actions of someone else. By deeming their behavior offensive, I am letting them know that I don’t approve. If someone told me they didn’t approve of me in some area, I don’t think that would motivate me to change. I think it would make me stay away from them. If it were a group of people, I might actually feel isolated from that group.
Lets call that group “1st Community Church”. Lets say that the mission of 1st Community Church was to be a vessel of God’s love to the community. Ultimately, the idea is that people experience the unconditional love of God and enter into their own personal relationship with him. Thus, becoming a vessel of Gods love to others and so on and so on.
Now lets say that the members of 1st Community Church have lots of community outreaches where they help the members of their community with yard-work or whatever. Great community church. Right?
Now lets say that the individual members of the church are frequently offended by the lifestyles of those who haven’t yet conformed to the rules they govern themselves by. How does this demonstrate unconditional love? How does this model work to fulfill the mission of the church? Why would anyone who isn’t perfect, or at least who hasn’t perfected the art of looking perfect, want to be a part of 1st Community Church? More specifically, is this the model we expect them to duplicate?
This model is a recipe for an implosion of the church. This model is essentially waiting for people to mess up and be judged and ostracized. This model will destroy the church and its mission. This model laughs in the face of The Gospel of Grace.
Jesus hung out with those who were outcasts of the church. I wonder how he did this. Why would they let him hang out if he was always offended by (judging) everything they did and said. I think he loved them. I think he loved them regardless of their lifestyle… unconditionally. And I think that model of unconditional love was so attractive to people that they pursued God and became a model of unconditional love too… and so on and so on.
I speak from experience here. I was this person for many years. I had a standard that I expected people to live by. If they didn’t, I probably treated them differently than I treated all of the “perfect” people in my life. I wanted people to “act right” because I love people and I truly want everyone to improve. I had good motives. But my perspective was skewed. I think the key is to accept the fact that we are all on a journey. Mine looks differently than yours. Mine has different speed bumps than yours. But the fact is the only one I need to worry about is mine. And I need to love others while they are figuring out their own journey. I still want to help people have better lives. But it’s okay with me if they don’t. I choose not to be offended.
I read a great quote the other day. It has kind of bookmarked my mind over the last few days. Things turn out the best for the people who make the best of the way things turn out. – John Wooden Life happens. Things don’t always go our way. Sometimes, things go the exact opposite […]
Last Saturday, we had a very unique opportunity for a little family fun. A friend of ours had a birthday and wanted to celebrate by participating in a zombie walk in downtown Houston. Now, I know very little about zombies and even less about how to become a zombie. However, the one thing I do […]
As we go through life, we become collectors of stuff. Our bodies have a way of expanding to accommodate all of the stuff we put in them. Unfortunately, our homes don’t operate this way. We actually have to take time to clean out the stuff from time to time or we will become overrun with […]
These words haunted me for many years. My husband and I were in debt and it seemed that all of our income was being used up by payments to a variety of different banks. I remember this feeling well. It was crippling. I remember beating myself up for getting in this position to begin with. […]
Who am I? What is my purpose in life? What should I do with my life? What is the meaning of life? I did a little research and found that the phrase “who am I” has been googled (is that a word?) more than 100 million times in the last month; 20 million of those […]
The exclamation points behind this word would lead one to believe there is a sense of frustration when saying this word. And ten years ago, that is exactly the emotion I thought I would have right about now. But, I am pleased to say that I don’t feel that emotion at all. I love having […]
Last week (Part 1), I talked about the importance of peace in my life and how I find ways to budget my time to help me keep peace. This week, I have some confessions to make. Sometimes, I waste time. I’m not always productive and sometimes, I’m downright lazy. So, I made a list of […]
Last week, (in Part 1) we talked about the reasons budgeting never worked for my household until we unlocked the mystery of the cash flow plan. This plan changed our lives by helping us create and implement a plan to get out of debt and save money for the first time ever. This week, I […]
I like evaluating things to find a better, more efficient way of doing things. It is a very natural way for my brain to think. I find myself doing this often. As a matter of fact, I have to make a choice not to do this if I’m in a situation where I just need […]